I’m no stranger to failure. I can clearly describe every single time I’ve failed, and have written about my past failures many times over. Recently, one of my friends asked me how my business was going. I told her that I was at the best point in my life; the best business scenario I had ever been in. I had finally found my calling. She’s known about my struggles to build a business which makes me glow with pride and joy. She’s seen me down in the dumps. This time around she asked me, what changed? What did I do differently this time around, to finally succeed?
I had to think for a minute. The answer was not so clear-cut. I told her, I failed so many times before that I am completely done with it. I am at the point of no return this time around. I’ve tasted failure so I know what it’s like. Now when I feel the fear of failing creep in my body, I can easily detect what it is, face it, and move on. I’ve learned to embrace failure, pick myself back up, and keep going. Now failure doesn’t feel like such a big deal anymore. Now, I’m finally open to success.
I think, once you let go of the fear to fail; once you decide, OK if I fail then so be it…I’ll learn from the experience, then the fear of failing will not feel so intense, and won’t be such an obstacle towards your success.
We tend to create such HUGE stress for ourselves, based on what we think the experience will be like; bracing ourselves for the pain. I remember when I had to get my first root canal, on one of my molars, I was trying to prep for the immense pain I thought I would feel. I would ask people about their experiences when they got one done, or search through Google to know what to expect: pain. Pain was the answer each and every time. I cried on my way to the dentist because I was so scared…but no matter what, I had to go through with it. So I’m in the chair, going through the regular motions at the dentist’s office…I didn’t feel a thing, until…she pulled out the nerve. I felt two seconds of pain. Just two seconds. The sensation was strange because the rest of my mouth was numb, so I think I was more caught off guard that I felt something at all. Honestly, it was like a quick nothing. I don’t even remember what the pain felt like, just the memory of some kind of feeling. Done and done.
So, let the fear of failure do its job of trying to stop you from succeeding…just keep going. Take it one step at a time and stop to rest if you have to, but keep going. And if you do fail, now you’ve faced it. Now you know what’s it’s like. Sure it sucks in the immediate moment you experience it, but your desire to succeed is so great that it will not stop you from trying again. Keep going!
Next, use your failures as tools to your successes. Learn from what worked and what didn’t work, for the next attempt. Also acknowledge that the “failure” was just an experience; one of many in our lives. Don’t give it more power than it deserves.
Be persistent! Think of your success as drops of water. A drop now may not change the shape of a rock, but consistent drops over time will enact change. That rock you thought was too strong for your drops is now transformed because of your persistence.
And don’t take ‘persistence’ for force. I’m not advising you to be forceful or pushy with your goals; go with the flow. By persistence I mean…KEEP GOING! Keep going despite the fear, despite the failure, despite the darkness.
Surrender to the process…probably the hardest lesson. We want to control so much about our lives, including how the success will come about. Remember to keep the vision (thoughts + feelings) of your desire but surrender the outcome. I say, keep the intention of success but just let go of how that will look for you. When I was living in New York I built a fantasy in my head of having my dream job (or dream business), and being super successful. I worked at it, and it didn’t work out…or so I thought. I thought it didn’t work out because I didn’t find my dream job and I was broke. But guess what? All of that lead me to take the biggest leap of faith in my life (to date).
I won’t lie to you and say this is so easy, you can do it! The life of an entrepreneur is one that takes immense courage and heart. This will be a challenge; the level of difficulty, however, is up to you.
On a more practical note…your business also needs a ton of TLC in the beginning stages. Your business starts out as a newborn baby and as such you have to nourish it, love and care for it. You have to give it what it needs to grow. There are many, many opportunities out there to find some great tools and resources to nourish your business. With the right education and tools, you can have an easier time of achieving that success you crave. For all you bloggers out there, I would love to be given the opportunity to help you achieve your goal of building a successful, online business from your content! Build something from what you already know. I have an upcoming course for you, starting on April 27th; hope you will join and give your blog the TLC it needs to grow.